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Solowingnow

~ Dealing with change doesn't mean starting over; it's about how you transition from wherever you are right now to the next place.

Solowingnow

Tag Archives: life

Times Like These

02 Thursday Jan 2025

Posted by Pat in Uncategorized

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Tags

diy, handyman, life, plumbing, toilet

At my age, which is not old but I can see it from here, the things I can’t do seem to be gaining ground. Mostly that seems to be limited to things I need expert help for, but I’m worried the day is coming when it will be “regular” stuff, too.

For example, I can still manage to hook up a camper and drive it a few thousand miles, but I had to call for “real” help when the black tank cracked. I can mow my own yard and mulch the leaves- when I can pull the cord with enough strength to start the engine. I can paint a wall but what used to take a day now takes a few days. And I’ve been ordered by friends and family alike to stay off of ladders. It’s frustrating to have to admit to myself that I am not as independent as I’d like to think I am.

Today I tried something that should have been relatively easy, quick, and painless. I bought a new toilet seat that will give me a rise of about 2″ when sitting; not much, but I won’t have to plop down, and getting up should be easier on the knees. It’s not really for me, it’s for a friend (and friends like her) who recently found herself in the embarrassing situation of not being able to get up from the throne by herself, at someone else’s house for an evening, and she had locked the bathroom door, so calling for help was not the first thing she thought of. Fortunately, after what seemed like a long enough time for the others waiting to give her a ride home, she was able to engage her core enough to stand and lean on the sink for leverage. But I have lived in a house that had the higher commodes, and admittedly, they were useful for me even back then.

So today was the day I tried to put it on. First, you have take off the current seat. Which has probably been in place for 20 years. No kidding. One side loosened up quite nicely. The other did not loosen. At all. The side against the wall, naturally. I hunted down a pliers and eventually a wrench when finger-turning produced no results except a scraped knuckle. Interestingly though, between me trying to loosen this bolt and fitting between the commode and the wall, I jiggled the toilet enough that the water line started leaking. By leaking, I mean spraying water everywhere. Onto the wood floor. I extricated myself from the small space I was in, on my side, then to my knees, to get up and get a bowl from the kitchen to catch the water. I tried to turn off the water supply, but that knob was also on so tight I couldn’t get it to budget without a few cuss words. And even so, it continued to drip. A lot. I got a bigger bowl.

By now, I have emptied the bowl three times, and it probably needs it again. I just do not have the strength or dexterity or leverage to tighten anything under there. I am wavering between being royally ticked off and frustrated, and being deeply saddened by the fact that I am almost old.

I called a neighbor who I have shared names with for electricians, painters, handymen, etc. I have names of two plumbers from her, one with an * by it, but I don’t know if that means “good” or “bad.” She said it was good, so I called him. Wouldn’t you know, it’s still holiday season, and he’s out of state. He referred me to someone else, and I left a message but no return call after a half hour. I look out on my street and there don’t seem to be any cars belonging to capable strong people who could help me out.

So I called my “handyman” guy, who isn’t really a handyman; he’s a carpenter. He tiled my bathroom shower, laid flooring in the hallway, installed new patio doors, and attached an antique fireplace mantle to a wall for me. I asked him for a referral to a plumber or true handyman, but when I told him I had water dripping, he said he would stop by himself and see what he could do. He’s at another job, so it will be a few minutes. And now I understand why tradespeople/subcontractors sometimes take longer than you think is necessary to get a job done. They take calls from stressed out people like me. And come to their aid.

In years past, I have painted rooms, moved plenty of furniture, planted and transplanted bushes and flowers, put together a crappy metal shed, laid both brick and flagstone sidewalks, replaced a garbage disposal, rewired lamps, put together furniture that came packed in a box, cleaned out gutters, dug holes using a post hole digger, replaced a toilet wax ring, and put a deadbolt lock on a door. I own tools that aren’t just screwdrivers; I have a multi-purpose tool, an air compressor, a sander, a saw or three, a sledgehammer, and a cordless drill, among others. I know how to use them all, some better than others. Turning a damn threaded nut on a bolt should not be a big deal.

It’s time like these that make a woman like me think twice about having a man around on a regular basis. Luckily, I can still just buy their time when I have an emergency. Because any man I might be interested in might also not have the physical strength that I don’t have, nor the necessary agility or dexterity or stability required.

The good news is that things like this have happened often enough in the past couple of years that I don’t always cry as my first response to the frustration of times like these. Now, I have to go empty the bowl again.

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More (Stranger) Things Than These

30 Wednesday Oct 2024

Posted by Pat in Uncategorized

≈ 1 Comment

Tags

cars, family, life, travel, weather

Disclaimer: I am not familiar with the tv show Stranger Things, except I know there is one. I know little about Shakespeare, except I know some of the quotes from having lived long enough and gone through enough English classes and seen enough movies to remember some of the more popular ones. And yet, what comes to mind today is that there are more stranger things going on in my world than I could dream up.

The Shakespeare quote actually goes “There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.” Which I interpret to mean that our imaginations are powerful but limited given our upbringing and environment. Therefore, angels, spirits, and ghosts are real, even if I haven’t been trained to believe in them and don’t see them. And so are miracles. A question I have is whether they facilitate miracles. What I do know is that crazy things are happening in my life, and there is no other explanation than something outside my experience and my current way of thinking is presenting itself. I just don’t know what do about it. If anything.

By now, you know I’m big on backstory, so bear with me.

2024 has been a year of … I don’t know what to call it. A year of exposure, challenge, introduction, opportunity. Other years have also provided me with inexplicable events that now in retrospect I can see have been a soft opening to other worldly experiences.

I remember a time when I was about in 5th grade, attending Catholic school, and having to attend Mass every Wednesday if not every morning (it might have changed by then). Anyway, I was not feeling well and when I was supposed to be standing or kneeling, I sat down instead. Which was not allowed. But I did it because I “knew” – I didn’t hear a voice, but I knew – that God understood and it was okay to sit and let the dizziness I was feeling pass. It did pass, it was all okay. I never forgot that.

About 25 years later, my car hit some black ice and I spun off the highway toward a guardrail, then back across the lane to the concrete divider, and back to the guardrail. I saw a car next to me that had several small children standing in the back seat. I prayed to not let me hurt those children. I came to a stop, and when I checked the car, there was only the slightest rubbing of the black fender guard thing across the bumper. No dents, wrinkles, scratches; nothing. The car with the kids was out of sight. No one else hit me. No one stopped who could have seen what happened. Then one man was suddenly talking to me because he saw my car was on the side of the road, and he wanted to make sure I was okay. He hadn’t seen me careening around the lanes, just checking on me. Where he came from and where he disappeared to I do not know.

Another 10 or 12 years after that, I had a car issue with another car in another state. About 20 miles out of town, I lost power going down the interstate, but then it came back on, then it faded out, came on. I was able to turn around and head back to town. I had my two sons and a nephew with me. I prayed to just let me get these boys back to town safely. I made it to the first exit to town, which was still about 3-4 miles on the edge of town. The car totally died at the end of the off ramp. It was raining, but I was going to walk to the nearest house I could see, which was probably a mile away. Out of nowhere a cop car pulled over, from the opposite direction. He asked if I needed help, called a tow truck that would take 45 minutes to get there, and took the boys back to my house. They all disappeared, and my boys don’t even remember this, although they were teenagers at the time. As soon as the cop left, the tow truck immediately appeared. He towed my truck to a dealer, and took me home. The next day the car dealer said they had never heard of that tow company and there never was a bill for services.

To me, those were all angel encounters. And to me, angels and ghosts are not the same things. One is good, and the other … well, not as good.

There was the time the flashlight stopped working, I took the batteries out of it to remind myself to get new batteries, and then the flashlight turned on. With the batteries out of it, right there on the counter.

Just this spring my car, while in the garage, flashed its headlights twice. I was near the car but not in it, the keys were in my hand and the car was not turned on.

And then yesterday, while I was sitting at the kitchen table drinking my first cup of coffee, my 9 year old Maytag Bravos XL washing machine in the laundry closet next to the kitchen beeped three times. My reaction was that my load was done and I needed to put the clothes in the dryer. Except I wasn’t doing any washing. I had done laundry the day before. I walked over to check this out. As I always do, when I’m done with my last load, I prop the top of the washer open so the machine can dry out. It was still propped up. There were no lights on at the top of the washer. I have a lid lock feature so the machine cannot operate with the lid open. Not on. Lid open. And then the water turned on and sprayed inside the drum like it was starting a new load.

I watched this happen and wondered how to turn it “off” – because it wasn’t “on” that I could see. I was about to reach over the machine to turn the water supply off when the drum started agitating and spinning. So it was on?? There wasn’t a lot of water, certainly not enough to do a load. Not enough to even cover all the bottom of the drum but enough for me to feel the splash and to see it was definitely starting the filling cycle. Still no lights on the control panel. And then it all stopped. It’s wet yet – small puddles of water – a day later. (When I push the power button on, the panel lights up like it is supposed to, like nothing was or is wrong.) After a moment of shock, I raised my voice and told whatever It was that this wasn’t funny, I didn’t like It messing with me, and to go away, to get out of my house and not come back. Ever.

So that’s pretty “weird,” right?

I wish that was the end. I’m not sure it is, though.

Because the day before, my 9 year old GE Adora freezer (side-by-side on the refrigerator) decided on a rumspringa of sorts. The fridge was just fine and dandy at 37 degrees, like it supposed to be. The 0 degree preferred freezer temperature as indicated on a control panel on the front of the freezer read 16 degrees. Not good. A few ice cubes apparently caught in the chute of the water dispenser fell out and left little puddles on my floor. I took all the food to the chest freezer in the garage and emptied the ice maker and turned it off. I unplugged it to hopefully have it reset itself, as advised by Dr. Google. I also took the back panel off and vacuumed the coils. (BTW, the vacuum didn’t want to work unless I held the switch in the On position. Today that vac works just fine.) By the next morning, the freezer was back down to 1 degree. I set it to -2, but it hasn’t gone lower than +1. The ice maker has not/will not make ice now, and there is no water from the dispenser either.

That should be enough for any one person to deal with, I think. Should be. Now the refrigerator temp is creeping up. It’s been at 40 since yesterday morning, but now is 42.

I wish that was the end of this saga, too. I’m not sure it is, though.

Because I’m still being messed with, now with technology, my 5-yr old Samsung A50 (android) cell phone to be specific. In the past few days (1) two friends in two days had their phones go dead while talking to me. (2) I sent a text message to my friend, but she received it as an email from my phone number. (3) I sent a picture via text to another friend. But it went to a wrong number I cannot delete from her contact info, a number that has not belonged to her in years. And I have sent other texts and pics to the newer number, but it keeps defaulting to the old number. (4) I called a woman to schedule a Reiki appointment. I got her voice mail, in which her voice said her name and the name of her business. I left a message. My phone reads that I left the message with another person, a man I serve with on the Board of Directors for my HOA. But the woman did get my message and responded to it later in the day. The man did not get the message.

Now, it would be easy to say these are a series of coinky-dinks, and to rationalize them happening. Or that they are unrelated and I just had them occur close in time to each other. Or that I need to reset or replace my phone. Or it’s the protons in the atmosphere that are raining down on us. I think not. And in conjunction with everything else going on, I cannot let go of the idea that they ARE related. I just don’t know how.

The best I can come up with to give me some peace of mind is that The Universe is sending me a message, and apparently I’m not receiving it, so the format is changing up and getting stronger. But I am not understanding the message. I need to pay attention, but I don’t know to what. Everything???

So if you see me being hypervigilant, witnessing and observing and looking zoned out, it’s because I’m paying attention to the world, to my life, to anything new and different. It’s making me a little crazy. The alternative is to contemplate having my entire house rewired, and that makes me even more crazy! Gotta run now. I have an electrician here … just to cover all my bases.

I am very curious. What do YOU think I should do? What else should I be considering???

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